


Counting Stars

by JenfysNest, KyloTrashForever



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, Camping, Come Swallowing, Dirty Talk, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Masturbation Interruptus, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Oral Sex, Outdoor Sex, Size Difference, Size Kink, Tent Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-10-20
Packaged: 2020-12-24 09:01:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21096860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JenfysNest/pseuds/JenfysNest, https://archiveofourown.org/users/KyloTrashForever/pseuds/KyloTrashForever
Summary: “He sure is a quiet one, Ben,” Poe muses.“Yeah,” Rey snorts, thinking of how he decided he wasputting up his tent by the river—too good to sleep near the rest of them. Such aBen Solothing to do. “He’s something alright.”“Yeah, well. Just remember—the point of this trip is to try and get along better.”“Sure.” Rey frowns down at the nylon in her grip, resisting the urge to roll her eyes. “We’ll get along just fine.”Poe claps her on the shoulder. “Great. Good to hear it.”He saunters off, and Rey makes a littlehmphbefore adding under her breath: “...as long as he stays down by the damn river.”In which Rey finds Ben Solo a hard man to like... until she finds him hard for her.





	Counting Stars

**Author's Note:**

> Based on this prompt from @Reylo_Prompts on Twitter:  
_Rey breaks into her neighbor’s apartment one night after hearing Ben’s cries for help. “Please, I just, I need you to...*sob* please. I need- I need it so bad. Please, Rey, I’m begging-“ What she finds is unexpected but she never turns her back on those in need._

* * *

“Can you move your leg?”

Ben makes no obvious effort to move, not even turning his face from the window to acknowledge her. “Where do you suggest I move it?”

“I don’t know.” She nudges his thigh with her own in the cramped back of the suburban. “You’re squishing me.”

He does turn then, casting a blank expression towards her face before turning it down to stare at their legs pressed against each other. He nudges her back for good measure. “There’s absolutely nothing I can do about that, short of miraculously getting smaller.”

She rolls her eyes, decidedly _not _letting them linger on his wide shoulders or anything _else _about him that has no chance of _getting smaller _anytime soon. “You could have sat up front.”

“I repeatedly asked to, if you remember.”

“You could have tried harder.”

“Did you want me to _ throw _Poe from the front seat so you could have more leg room?”

“I’m just saying, it makes _ no _sense for you to be—”

“_Guys.” _ They snap their heads towards the front of the suburban, meeting five pairs of eyes staring back at them. Poe casts an exasperated look at them both, heaving out an over-dramatic sigh. “Can you just… _ not _ bicker for one day? This is supposed to be a _ team building _trip.”

“No one asked you to shove me back here,” Rey grumbles. 

“We’ve got another hour of driving,” Poe tells them, “and I really don’t want to spend it listening to you both snipe at each other.”

“I’m not sniping,” Ben says evenly. “I’m just sitting.”

Rey snorts. “Taking up the entire seat is what you’re doing—”

“_Rey.” _

Rey huffs out a breath as she turns towards the window, keeping her mouth shut and pointedly ignoring Poe. She distracts herself by mentally ticking off all the reasons she wishes she weren’t sitting in the back of this suburban with _ Ben fucking Solo. _

She thinks about how he is a dirty commission stealer. The way he constantly gives her that look that _ screams _ that he thinks he’s better than she is. The way he never concedes the point and always keeps _ pushing_. The way she’s almost _ positive _that he’s the one who is quietly stealing her thin mints coffee creamer. 

Plenty of reasons as to why she would rather be anywhere else. 

It doesn’t make it easier that sometimes she finds herself looking at his mouth. That sometimes she wonders what it might be like to have an _ actual _ conversation with him that doesn’t devolve into an argument. That every so often, in the safety of her own bedroom—she imagines him pressed against her like this in a very _ different _ way. Does he have to _ look _like he does? Assholes aren’t supposed to look like he does. 

Rey sighs as she watches the trees goes by—thinking to herself that it’s going to be a _ very _long weekend. 

Why Poe decided camping in the middle of nowhere would “lead to a more cohesive team atmosphere”, Rey has no idea. 

They have a great team. As far as she’s concerned, there’s only one outlier skewing that team dynamic—so why is it everyone else’s responsibility to fix Ben Solo?

* * *

They make it to their campsite in less than the estimated hour. Rey can’t help but sigh with relief when she swings open the door and breathes in the scent of dirt and leaves and petrichor. She takes a long minute to stretch out her cramped legs and adjust her headspace before heading to the trunk to grab her bag. 

By the time she makes it back there, Rose and Kaydel are already following Poe and Armitage to the area that will be their home for the weekend. Rey sees there are six raised tent pads around a central area with a fire pit.

She pushes past where Ben is standing back waiting for Finn to grab his belongings out of the trunk.

“Watch yourself,” Ben says quietly when she rushes past him. 

Ignoring his comment, she reaches around Finn, grabbing her bag and jogging towards the rest of the group, hoping to get a spot as far away from Ben as possible.

Finn and Ben amble up behind the rest of the group just as Poe clears his throat and stands on the edge of a tent bed. 

“Okay team, first things first—time to pitch the tents,” Poe says with a clap of his hands. “Each of us has an individual tent that we’ll be putting together. If you haven’t pitched a tent before, feel free to ask a more experienced team member for help,” Poe says. “Once that’s done, we’ll be building a fire together… _ from scratch_.”

“I for one,” Armitage snorts from his fancy camping chair he’s already set up under the shade of a tree, “will not be participating in _ tent _pitching.”

“You’ll participate, or you’ll sleep on the ground, babe,” Poe laughs. “I’m not doing it all by myself.”

“But you’re so _ good _at manual labor.”

Poe rolls his eyes. “Yeah, well, unless _ you _ would like to be doing _ manual _labor on your own later—I suggest you get your sweet ass off that chair.”

Hux is still grumbling as he pushes out of the chair, and Rey laughs quietly under her breath as she fiddles with the compact package of nylon and collapsible metal poles. She wonders for the dozenth time why it has to be _ tents _ when there is a perfectly good cluster of cabins not one mile further up—knowing deep down Poe _ definitely _pushed for this absurdity when he pitched this idea to the higher ups. 

_ Team building. _

It’s laughable, really. They all get along pretty well as it is—save for one. 

She casts her eyes across the way to see a familiar hulking figure in dark jeans and a fitted black Henley—taking a chair and duffle he brought, along with a tent bag, tucking them under his arm before he begins to stride away from the designated campsite. 

“Hey,” Rey calls out without thinking. “Where do you think you’re going?”

He stops walking for a moment, raising an eyebrow at her. “I’m going to put up my tent by the river.”

“Really?” She narrows her eyes. “Too good to sleep near the rest of us?”

She realizes how catty she sounds—but it is _ such _ a Ben Solo thing to do. Decide that he’s too good to even _ camp _near them. 

“If that’s how you want to spin it,” he says coolly, turning on his heel to stomp off. 

She watches him go with still-narrowed eyes, shaking her head as she returns to her task and refusing to let him get under her skin. 

Poe doesn’t miss his absence either. “Where is Ben going?”

Rey lowers her voice to a snooty and mocking tone. “_Putting up his tent by the river. _”

“Hm.” Poe’s brow knits before he dips his hands around his mouth, shouting in Ben’s direction. “Make sure you come right back when you’re done for the team building exercises!”

Ben just raisese an arm over his head, giving a little wave as he continues to disappear down the path. Poe shakes his head, cocking his hands on his hips. “He sure is a quiet one, Ben.”

“Yeah,” Rey snorts. “He’s something alright.”

“Kind of hot though, don’t you think?”

Rey’s face heats. “No. I don’t think.”

Poe gives her a grin that she doesn’t want to read into—fixing her gaze on the pile of tent poles she’s still trying to figure out. “Yeah, well. Just remember—the point of this trip is to try and get along better.”

“Sure.” Rey frowns down at the nylon in her grip, resisting the urge to roll her eyes. “We’ll get along just fine.”

Poe claps her on the shoulder. “Great. Good to hear it.”

He saunters off to he and Hux’s own tent pile then—and Rey makes a little _ hmph _before adding under her breath: “...as long as he stays down by the damn river.”

* * *

By the time Rey is done setting up her tent, Poe is back to playing camp counselor-cum-motivational speaker, and he’s perched on the edge of the tent bed preparing to address the group entire group—sans Ben.

“Why does Solo get out of dealing with Ranger Poe?” Rey whispers to Rose.

“I’m sure he’ll be here any minute. The river is a little hike from camp, and he had to put up his tent, too.”

“Well, if he would have stayed _ here _ with the rest of us common folk, he wouldn’t _ have _ to hike.”

Before Rose can respond, Poe clears his throat and shoots a pointed glare in the direction of their whispering. “Okay, guys, we’ve got some time before nightfall, so I want to work on our first official team building activity. We are going to build a fire!” Poe’s enthusiasm is met with silence until Armitage starts a half-hearted slow clap from his seat in the chair he never _ really _ bothered to get out of. 

“Thanks, babe,” Poe says, smiling at Armitage before turning and giving the rest of the team an exasperated sigh. “Come on guys, it isn’t so bad. You’ll be learning an important survival technique, while also forming knowledge and understanding collaboratively.”

“Man,” Ben starts from behinds them—his voice jolting Rey from her frustrated musings. _ If that’s how you want to spin it. _“There is nothing more disturbing than Poe trying to be inspiring.”

His comment earns a snicker from the team, and Rey huffs. “Keep it down Solo, he’s going to give us the instructions. I’m sure you don’t care, considering you couldn’t be bothered to show up when you were supposed to.”

“He’s here now,” Kaydel chimes in.

Rey hears him whisper a mumbled _ thank you _ in Kaydel’s direction, and the interaction does nothing to calm Rey’s frustration.

“Anyway,” Poe continues on, “we’ll be splitting up into three teams. I’ve got flint, so one team is tasked with preparing the pit area, one will be finding suitable firewood, and the rest will look for tinder. _ You _ are empowered to pick your teams. And just think, the sooner the fire is built, the sooner we can break out the boxed wine and marshmallows.”

“Can we be the pit team?”

Poe casts a look of fond irritation towards his boyfriend. “Are you going to sit in that chair while _ I _do it?”

Hux blows him a kiss, and Poe just shakes his head. Rey immediately gravitates towards Rose and Finn—but they’re already off hand-in-hand towards the tree line hollering something about firewood. Which leaves—

“Guess we’re getting tinder then,” Kaydel offers feebly, picking up on the tension between Rey and Ben. Well, mostly Rey—who is is glaring up at his hulking figure. Ben seems particularly distracted by a pile of rocks he’s nudging with his shoe. 

“I guess that’s fine,” Rey tosses back at them. “If Solo can be bothered with such a menial task.”

He purses his lips, but says nothing as he continues to push the rocks around. Kaydel is looking anywhere but at them. Rey huffs out a breath as she stomps off—hearing the pair of them follow behind. 

She isn’t sure why she’s so much more on _ edge _ this weekend. At the office it’s easier. At the office she can quietly avoid him. She doesn’t have to think about his eyes that always seem disappointed when he looks at her. Doesn’t have to be bothered with the way _ she _feels disappointed that he so obviously thinks she’s lacking somehow. 

Out here… all of these things seem inescapable.

“This will work,” Ben murmurs, yanking bits of dried bark from a large cedar tree. “It’ll smell good burning, too.”

Rey hmphs, picking up a handful of twigs. “Oh, and you’re an expert, are you?”

“Well,” he offers carefully. “I have been camping before, if that’s what you mean.”

“Oh, really?” Rey doesn’t miss how Kaydel seems desperate to buffer between the two of them. “Do you go often?”

“Not in recent years. I used to go all the time with my Dad.”

“Can’t be bothered now, can you?” Rey doesn’t look up at him as she grabs for another stick. “Too busy swiping clients and tossing your weight around?”

Ben doesn’t answer, but she hears him heave a sigh before there is a series of tearing sounds as he gathers a pile of the bark in his arms. “I’m just going to take this back to the campsite.”

Rey watches him go, torn between frustration with _ him _ and frustration with _ herself _for this terrible side he brings out in her. 

“Man,” Kaydel tuts after Ben is out of earshot. “You _ really _ don’t like him.”

Rey takes a deep breath, bending to grab for another stick. “He started it.”

“Yeah, what _ did _ happen anyway? I know that he—”

“Guys!” Poe’s voice sounds from down the hill. “We need that tinder!”

“Tell you later,” Rey mumbles, clutching her pile tight as she starts to walk back. 

* * *

The fire is roaring and her paper cup of wine is nearly empty, and Rey’s not sure if it’s the former or the latter, but she feels warm and _ content _ inside for the first time since they all piled into the Suburban that morning.

After they came back with the tinder, things had been awkward for a little bit, but once they started building the fire, there really was a sense of cooperation that Rey usually doesn’t get in the presence of Ben. After everyone—except Armitage, who said his hands _ only handle one kind of raw wood _—had taken turns trying to get the flint to catch the kindling, it had ultimately been Ben who was able to get the fire blazing.

“I feel very attuned to my inner caveman standing over this fire roasting meat. There’s something primal about the whole thing,” Poe muses while hunched over the flame, hot dog on a stick in hand.

“You’re cooking a store-bought wiener, dear, not roasting a wild boar you killed with your own hands.” Armitage tears into his pre-packaged charcuterie plate. “Calm down.”

When Rey gives Armitage a sideways glance, he just looks at her and says, “I don’t eat meat off sticks. It’s uncivilized.”

“It may be uncivilized, but it’s delicious,” Finn chimes in, taking an exaggerated bite. Rose just looks at him and giggles.

Both Finn and Rose have partaken pretty heavily in _ the best boxed wine on the market _—at least according to Poe—and are loose-limbed and even looser-tongued.

“That was a great job with the fire, Ben,” Rose says before scooting in even closer to Finn’s side. He puts an arm around her shoulders, and Rey averts her eyes at the simple intimacy of it all. Rose and Finn had been dancing around each other for ages, but when Poe pursued Armitage, the concern about appearances fell by the wayside.

“Yeah, Ben.” Finn nods. “You were like a regular mountain man. You could have saved us newbies by taking over earlier.” 

Rey looks at Ben. Even in the firelight she can make out the bright red blush in his cheeks, and when he smiles, it reaches his eyes. She never gets smiles like that. But, then again, why would she? As soon as he sees her looking, the smile falters.

“I know Poe wanted it as a learning opportunity and I didn’t want to interfere.”

“Well,” Finn laughs. “You’re on fire duty for the rest of the weekend. You have my full permission to interject whenever you want.”

Rey can’t help but notice how the firelight emphasizes Ben’s corded arms—his Henley rolled up to his elbows from earlier when he worked the kindling into a roaring fire. She remembers him bent over the wood, his hands moving deftly to add just the right amount of kindling at just the right time. When she finds herself staring at the plushness of his lips, at the constellation of moles that dot his neck and face, she crosses her legs and wills herself to stop looking at him so intently. It’s making her think things she’d rather not think about.

“How’s the river, Ben?” Rey has a feeling she might be corrupting the levity of the moment, but she finds her words lack the usual invective thrown in his direction. She’s genuinely curious. He seems to be getting along so well with everyone tonight, so why did he want to be so far away?_ If that’s how you want to spin it. _That’s what he’d said when she accused him of being too good for the group.

“It’s nice.” The answer is curt. His eyes never leave the fire, his defensiveness apparent. 

His words and tone leave Rey frustrated, and she can’t quite put her finger on why. She felt she was _ trying _ to extend an olive branch. 

“That’s it? No explanation for why you don’t want to be around us, Solo?”

“_Rey,” _Poe starts, his tone chastising.

“Don’t worry about it,” Ben says when he stands. “I’m going to get out of everyone’s hair.” Rey doesn’t miss how he casts one last glance in her direction before heading off. “Night.”

She also doesn’t miss the way he averts his eyes with his farewell, and she knows deep down it wasn’t meant for her. She clutches her cup a little tighter, feeling a strange sense of _ something _in her chest that feels… unpleasant. Sticky and hot—almost as if her own body is plagued with some sort of regret over her actions. 

She tells herself it’s just the wine.

“So you never said”—Kaydel plops her folding chair right down next to Rey, eyes bright over her cup as she leans in—“what your deal is with Ben.”

Rey takes another slow sip from her cup, brow furrowing. “We just… didn’t get off to a very good start.”

“Details, details,” Kaydel urges, nudging Rey with an elbow. “It’s always so… tense. When you’re both in the room.”

“It’s not _ that _bad,” Rey mumbles half-heartedly, knowing it's more or less a lie. “It’s just…” Rey sighs. “He really screwed me over when I first started.”

“Really? How so?”

“So I landed this client,” Rey starts, turning her body. “Some rich guy looking for a condo downtown, right? The commission alone would have set me up for months.” Rey scowls, remembering. “Until Ben came along.”

Kaydel makes a face, seeming to realize where this is going. “He didn’t.”

“He did.” Rey nods emphatically. “He _ did. _ Fucking swiped him right out from under me. Apparently he and Snoke go way back, and he just—”

“Wait, wait, wait.” Kaydel shakes her head, rubbing her temples as if trying to remember something. “James Snoke?”

Rey cocks an eyebrow. “Yes…?”

“Oh, wow,” Kaydel snorts. “You really dodged a bullet there. Trust me.”

Rey blinks back at her, not quite understanding. “What do you mean?”

“James Snoke is a pig. Total horndog. Bad habit of really trying to get that _ special treatment _during showings.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Not at all.” Kaydel wrinkles her nose. “I tried to report him when he grabbed my ass at an open house—but like you said, he’s old friends with the owners.

“Wait.” Rey closes her eyes against the hazy feeling of what she suspects is becoming too much wine, trying to find her bearings. “_ Ben _is the owner?”

“Not _ Ben_,” Kaydel clarifies. “Not really—but his grandfather. Not that he ever comes around. He kind of gives Poe free rein as long as we keep bringing in money. And Snoke is an old friend _ and _ big bucks, so—” She just shrugs, resignedly. 

Rey sinks back into her chair, trying to process this overwhelming new information. She thinks back to the day she stormed into Ben’s office—wracked with anger after having learned that Snoke had decided to go through Ben after some shady dinner party she’d only learned about by chance. She remembers the way he’d tried to justify it—_ trust me, Rey, you couldn’t have handled it. _ The way that had only infuriated her more. The way she’d _ shouted. _ The things she’d _ said. _

The way nothing had ever really been amiable since. 

Something like guilt starts to settle into Rey’s stomach. The incident with the Snoke sale had basically formed her _ entire _ opinion on Ben. Had she been wrong about him? She’d just assumed he was a dick who thought she couldn’t hack it, but Kaydel’s words are forcing Rey to reevaluate how she perceived him from the very beginning.

“Hey, Kay, I’m actually going to go take a walk,” Rey says while standing and collapsing her chair.

“Oh, I can come with you if you want. It’s getting kind of late, I don’t want you to get lost, or eaten by a bear, or whatever else usually happens in the woods.”

“No, it’s okay. I’m going to grab a flashlight, and I’ll stick to the trail.”

“Hey, Rey, are you okay? I didn’t upset you, did I?”

“No. No, of course not. I actually… I think I might owe Ben an apology… for a few things. Maybe. I don’t know, it’s all kind of confusing. Anyway, I’ll be fine, I just want to try to clear things up with him tonight, so you guys won’t have to deal with us bickering tomorrow.

“Okay. Just don’t murder each other out there in the woods or anything.”

“I’ll try my best.” Rey gives Kaydel one last reassuring smile, and then heads to her tent to grab her flashlight. 

* * *

Rey closes the flaps of her sweater and pulls down the sleeves to cover her hands. Away from the warmth of the fire at camp, she notices the bite in the chilly night air. She finds herself wondering if Ben has built his own fire, and if he hasn’t, she wonders if he’s cold out here on his own. She shivers as she hugs herself, the cool air washing away some of the effects of her campfire imbibing. The sobering cold leaves her with nothing to do but _ think. _

With the chatter from camp completely fallen away, Rey works on deciphering what exactly is up with Ben Solo. 

She thinks back to when she first started. Things were friendly in the beginning, she remembers. He was always quiet around her—sort of reserved, but sweet. She’d sit at her desk playing out scenarios where she could bring him out of his shell a bit more. She liked his hands and his ears that always found themselves peeking out from under his hair. She remembers being able to make them pink with something as simple as a _ good morning _. 

And then Snoke happened. 

When she’d found out what Ben did, she felt betrayed, and she was furious—a feeling she hasn’t let go of since. But now, with Kaydel’s words ringing in her ears, she can’t help but wonder if Ben’s words that day—_ trust me, Rey, you couldn’t have handled it— _were motivated by something other than condescension.

She can start to hear the low soft hum of the river through the trees, and she can see the appeal of getting away from the chaos at camp. It comes into view when she crests the hill, the moonlight glittering along its surface as the water flows peacefully, lapping softly at the shore in a steady back-and-forth. She can spot his tent there, pitched beneath a wide tree and shadowed by its branches. 

There are no traces of a fire to be found as she nears his little camp, and again that gnawing guilt eats at her insides—magnified, she thinks, with the memory of every hurtful thing she’s said to him during the time they’ve worked together. Wondering with each one if they’d been a mistake.

She can see even from the several yards left between them that Ben’s tent is zipped up tight—and she holds back for a moment, wondering if he’s asleep. It hasn’t even been an hour since he left their campsite, but it could be possible, she supposes, that he came down here and went straight to bed. 

She tries not to think about how Ben might sleep. 

How little he might _ wear. _

_ But did he sleep all the way down here because of you? _ that same snide voice taunts. _ Has the problem really only _ ever _ been with you? _

Rey chews on her lower lip, knowing if she doesn’t do this now she might lose her nerve tomorrow. She picks up her feet, moving to close the distance between herself and his tent—spurred by her own guilt and a magnitude of other feelings she’s always done her best not to think about. Ones that are very much still concerned with how little Ben might wear to sleep. 

She’s close now, close enough that she could call out to him, and she’s opening her mouth to do that, to _ say _something—

But she never gets the chance. 

She’s confused at first, straining her ears to catch the soft voice that carries on the wind, leaning in to make out the words that distracted her in the first place. 

“Please. I just—_ please— _ I need it— _ fuck— _just like that—”

Oh god. _ Oh God. _ Rey feels a blush creeping up her neck, her cheeks heating as she realizes what’s happening in that tent. She knows every other person is up there at the campfire, knowing that Ben can only be there with himself. Knowing that he’s—to himself— _ right now— _

She decides this can absolutely wait till morning. She turns on her heel with every intention to quietly sneak away, to never _ speak _ of this—but one word draws her back. One word that is choked, like a sob, _ pleading _even—one word that she’s never heard him say like he does in that moment. 

“_Rey._” Her heart pounds in her ears, beating like a drum, and somehow obliterating all other sounds but the one of his voice. “_Fuck. Rey_.”

_ Is he—is he really in there—thinking about— _

Rey takes a deep breath, then a big step, all thoughts of turning back forgotten. Maybe it’s the lingering bit of wine, maybe it’s the way he says her name, maybe it’s the way some secret part of her has fantasized about him saying her name that way—maybe it doesn’t _ matter _ why. 

She thinks now she wants to settle this tonight. 

She slowly makes her way closer to his tent, moving carefully around the area he’s set up camp, so as to not disturb him. She tells herself she wants to catch him in the act, because then he can’t deny what she knows he’s said—can’t deny he cried out for _ her _ . She knows deep inside that’s only part of the reason. The slickness developing between her legs, the ache she _ already _ feels listening to him stroke himself with thoughts of her on his mind and her name on his lips, it’s heady, and _ seeing _ him do it—seeing him stroke his cock to her—became a _ need _ as soon as she heard him whimper her name. 

She has no memory of how she made it from the trailhead to the zippered entrance of Ben’s tent, but here she stands. She can hear his pace has quickened just slightly—his once long slow strokes coming shorter and faster now. The sound of skin slapping skin and fabric rustling, bleed through the nylon tent and drift into the night air. Her cunt is _ throbbing _ with how his soft moans and louder groans excite her. Every hitch of his breath making her more and more delirious with need. 

She wants to open the tent and step inside. She wants to confront him, but at the same time a part of her doesn’t. What if he sends her away? What if she walks out of the tent with the ache inside her unfulfilled?

She’s loose and tense all at once, and she just needs to take the edge off _ a little_. Without even thinking about it, her hand slips into the waistband of her pants, and she quietly widens her legs slightly to slip her fingers first over, and then through, her slit. She’s _ so wet_. So wet from hearing Ben Solo fucking his fist in the tent right in front of her, just a thin barrier separating her hands from his body. Her slick fingers find the swollen nub of her clit, and she starts rubbing soft circles around it. She moves at his pace, she rubs her herself with each stroke he makes on his cock. She’s biting her lip, almost to the point of _ bleeding _, to hold back the whimpers that threaten to escape her. 

She can hear him getting closer, his hands sliding up and down faster and faster, and his moans growing more eager. She knows he’s going to come soon, and when he does—_god help her_—so will she. 

“Rey, please, I’m _ begging_—” 

Oh God. 

She can’t. She can’t let him come without her—literally _ begging for her _ —when she’s right outside. When she can _ do _ something about it. It takes everything in her power to pull her hand away when she’s _ so close, _but she has to. 

Rey steels herself and unzips Ben’s tent.

She doesn’t know who is more surprised by her being there when she pulls back the flap and lowers her head. Ben’s eyes are wide, staring at her with a shell-shocked expression as his hand fists his cock tight. She can see darkened head just above his grip, see the way his chest rises and falls roughly beneath his t-shirt, the way his mouth hangs open as if he doesn’t quite believe she’s actually there.

“R-Rey?”

She feels a little like she can’t breathe. Her eyes flick back-and-forth between every part of him she can drink in, repeatedly dipping back down to his cockhead that twitches above his fist—and she knows how close he is. Can see it. Can _ hear _it in his rasped breath. 

It barely registers when she lowers further to duck under the tent flap, stepping inside with him as he seems at a loss for what to do—unsure if he should release his cock and scramble away or keep still. 

“Rey, what are you—”

She falls to her knees in front of him. “You took the Snoke commission to protect me, didn’t you.”

“What? Snoke? I—”

“Tell the truth.” She leans in a little unwittingly, not even trying to tear her eyes away from the sight of his cock, her mouth watering just _ looking _at it. “It’s because he was a dickish old pervert, wasn’t it.”

Her eyes flick up to his face, watching his mouth open and close dumbly, trying to make sense of her thought process, she thinks. Hell—at this point, so is she. He nods slowly, and it breaks something inside her, or maybe it puts her back together, she isn’t sure—she just knows something _ is _ inside her—something that’s always been there, she thinks. Something for _ Ben. _

And now it’s awake.

He makes some panicked sound when she curls over his body, batting his hand away and wrapping her own around the warm length of him. He chokes out something (her name, maybe?) when she drags her tongue over the head, closing her eyes as the salty taste of him lingers at her tongue—and none of this makes sense, _ none _of it—but she doesn’t care. Not even a little. 

“You can come, Ben,” she urges hoarsely, flattening her tongue just under the thick head. “You can come in my mouth.”

She sinks her lips over the swollen tip, sucking just under his glans before letting the full weight of his shaft slide over her tongue to take him deep. He moans long and loud, hips tilting up to press deeper without even meaning to, she suspects. 

“Rey—I don’t—_Oh fuck—_you don’t have to— _ Jesus Christ—” _

She hums around his cock, suctioning her lips tight as she bobs up and down, feeling the gentle tug of his fingers in her hair. 

“If you don’t—_Rey—_if you keep—I’m going to—”

Rey pushes deep, feeling him brush at the back of her _ throat—_refusing to pull away. She’s so desperate for him, so out of her mind with need, she hums her assent and groans as she tastes more and more of his precum coating the back of her tongue. 

She can feel his cock throbbing more insistently with every bob of her head, and when she feels that first twitch against her tongue she _ knows _, pushing past her own limits, hollowing her cheeks and taking him as deep as he can go. 

“Oh god, your mouth—_Rey_—”

He comes in quick spurts, warm and thick, and _ so much, _and as quickly as Rey swallows, she can still hardly contain it, but she does—every last drop. She keeps him there deep inside her mouth, swallowing around him until he’s spent, and his cock lies still against her tongue. 

When she pulls herself off of him, her eyes still mesmerized by his half-hard dick, realization starts to hit her, and her eyes snap to his. He quickly pulls the elastic of his sleep pants over what’s left of his erection, hiding it from her view. She’s sure the look of surprise and concern in his face is mirrored in hers. 

They speak at the same time with panic in their voices. 

“Rey, _ fuck _, I’m sorry.”

“Ben, _ oh my god_, I’m so sorry.”

“No, Ben, I just—I came down here to talk. Kay told me about Snoke and what he did to her, and I realized what you did. For me. And then how I behaved after, I was—I felt horrible. So, I came down here to find out the whole truth—to _ apologize_, and… I _ heard _ you. 

“You heard me?”

“Yes, I… heard what you were doing… to yourself, and I was going to leave, I swear, but then—you said my name, Ben. I just couldn’t walk away. You sounded like you _ needed _ me.”

“You didn’t have to do what you did, Rey, and I should have stopped—“

“I know I didn’t _ have to._” She lowers her head thinking about all the times she’s laid in bed playing out in her mind’s eye a similar fantasy to what she’s just experienced in real life. “I _ wanted to_. I have for a long time. Probably from the very beginning, but you were always so quiet around me and then, well, the thing with Snoke happened, and it all became a confusing mess.”

“You’ve wanted to—with me?” He sounds so surprised, and Rey understands why he would be, considering her behavior toward him these last few months. 

She completely closes any distance that remains between them, crawling to kneel in between his open legs. She lifts his hand, placing a soft kiss on his palm.

“I did, Ben. I _ do_.”

“Rey, you have no idea how much I’ve wanted you. How much it killed me after what I had to do about Snoke.”

She closes her eyes, lips lingering against his hand, enjoying the warmth of it. “I was so awful.”

“I should have _ explained.” _

“—never should have acted—”

“—was such a coward—”

“—the things I _ said—” _

“—seemed to _ hate _me—”

“—so sorry, Ben. I’m _ so _sorry.”

She realizes she’s just kneeling between his thighs, his very _ large _ thighs—realizes that his cum still rests on her tongue, and his cock lay only inches from where she wants it. If she shifts a little she can _ feel _how wet she is—soaked through her underwear just with the memory of his thick cock prodding down her throat. 

She can’t help but imagine it filling her in other ways. 

She presses another chaste kiss against his palm, letting her eyes flutter open to find his in the dark space of the tent—his skin lit only by the filtered moonlight that peeks in through the mesh panels of the tent. She lets his hand fall, leaning a little closer, pressing a little _ further_—hands falling on either side of his hips until he dazedly falls back against his sleeping bag to let her straddle over him. 

She curls over his too-large body to find his mouth, and he tenses for only a moment before he melts into it. Before his warm, plush lips meet hers with equal fervor to move against them. His hand cradles the back of her head, fingers flexing against her hair as he licks into her mouth with a soft sound that makes her clench inside with a need for more. 

Through the thin material of her yoga pants she can _ feel _him against her, and she rubs lazily against the thick length, letting it slot between the lips of her cunt, rubbing herself against him as he moans into her mouth. 

“Rey,” he grunts. “The wine—” He shudders when she pulls his lip between her teeth, and she’s surprised he can even taste it on her tongue. All she can taste is _ him_. “Are you sure you—”

“Want this,” she manages hoarsely. “Wanted this for a long time.” She inches her fingers under his shirt, counting every ridge that passes beneath them. “Even when you _ infuriated _ me—I wanted to fuck you, I think.” She grinds down on his cock, drawing a sharp cry from them both. She mouths a path up his jaw, finding the soft lobe of his ear and pulling at it lightly with her teeth. “And I _ promise _you, I’m going to remember every second of this tomorrow.”

“_Fuck, _Rey.” His arms come around her, crushing her to his front. “You feel too good.”

She deliberately rubs against him, hearing the little hiss between teeth. His breath catches altogether when she wriggles out of his grip, sitting up in a straddle and reaching for the hem of her sweater. She keeps eye contact for as long as she’s able—his awestruck expression as he watches her pull it up and over, like a _ drug. _When she tosses it away, grateful that she’s foregone a bra—she finds she sort of loves the way he can’t stop staring.

His hand comes up tentatively, eyes flicking up to hers in a searching way. “Can I—?”

She brings her fingers to wrap around his wrist, tugging his hand to bring it to her chest, one palm completely _ swallowing _the mound of her breast and sending shooting sparks of heat under her skin. 

“Ben,” she breathes. “You can touch me wherever you want.”

His thumb sweeps around, and he runs the calloused pad over the hardened bud of her nipple. The sensation of it, combined with the knowledge that it’s _ Ben _ who’s touching her like this, makes her heart race even faster, and she can feel the drumming rhythm of it all the way to her cunt. Each beat a throb reminding her that she’s still _ empty _ when she can be so _ full _ of him. 

Before she even realizes what’s happening, he leans up and takes her other nipple into his warm mouth, sucking and laving and flicking the pebbled peak with his tongue until her hands are in his hair, and she pushes and pulls, unsure if she wants him to keep going or stop. She’s writhing along the length of his cock, and he’s _ so _ hard, and she’s so _ ready _.

“_Ben_, I need you inside me. Fuck—” She pulls his hair then, and he releases her nipple with an obscene _ pop _. His eyes meet hers, and he must see her desperation because one hand moves down the length of her body, and he rubs the crease of her through the fabric of her yoga pants. Pressing hard enough to spread her lips and pushing harder when he feels the swollen nub of her clit.

Her body bows, and her head lolls back, and she lets out a low groan, and he rubs _ harder. _

“Rey, you’re so fucking wet. You’ve soaked right through your pants.” There’s wonder and lust in his tone.

Rey needs to feel his body pressed against hers. She finds the hem of his shirt, and he raises his arms so she can pull it off. She drops it to the floor of the tent and leans back to admire the planes of his chest. She runs her fingers over the length of his torso before finding his nipples and pinching. His hips buck hard at her actions, and if they weren’t wearing clothes he could fuck into her with that same ferocity. She _ needs _ that. “I fucked myself outside your tent,” she says quietly.

His body stills under her. “What?” 

Rey wonders for a second if she made a mistake being too honest, but continues. “You sounded so good, and I touched myself outside. Listening—listening to you.”

Suddenly his arms wrap around her body, and he’s leaning up and turning them over. Rey’s back hits his sleeping back just as his lips crash into hers. “Is that why you’re so wet, Rey? Because you played with yourself while you listened to me jerk off to you?” He runs his hands under her thighs and spreads them so wide, and he rubs his cock against her and _ god _. 

“Yes. _ Ah, _yes. That’s why. Oh god, Ben, _ please_.”

He leans up and peels off her pants and underwear with it. When she lies bare before him, he takes a second to drink up her nakedness in the moonlight. “You’re so beautiful. Every part of you. I just knew you’d have a perfect little cunt, Rey,” he says as his fingers move to spread her lips, exposing her to him completely. “So soft and so wet and so _ small _ .” He slips a finger in her slick entrance and groans. “My cock is going to stretch this _ so _ tight,” he says just before he adds a second finger. “Is that what you wanted? When you were touching yourself outside my tent?” 

“God, yes, _ please_.”

He leans back over her, bracing himself on one arm while he lowers his sleep pants, freeing his cock. He rocks against her center that’s slick and warm and _ clenching _ with the need for him to be inside. He’s still watching where he rubs against her, and if she looks down, she can _ just _ make him out in the moonlight—sliding through her labia that _ envelopes _him, the thick head of his cock pressing up through her folds to lay heavy against her pubic bone. Further still to brush just under her navel. 

And Ben—Ben just watches as if he can’t quite believe it’s happening. 

She grabs for his shoulders, pulling him down and down until she can crash her lips against his, swallowing the little sound he makes as his skin slides against hers. There are whispered words of _ clean _ and _ birth control— _ Rey wanting nothing more than to _ feel _ him. Practically _ vibrating _ with a need for it. His palm drags down her thigh, curling over it, _ tugging _ it to spread her legs—and she can feel it. That nudge of his cock, that warm press at her slick entrance that _ pulses _with a need for him to be inside. 

Her mouth falls open as he begins to inch inside, and Ben’s lips wander to seek other conquests—brushing over her cheek and her jaw and her _ throat—_sucking wet little marks against her skin as if actually trying to _ consume _her.

He gasps when the head of his cock is swallowed up inside, flattening his tongue against her collarbone with a low rumble. “Knew it.” He bites gently at the swell of her breast as he eases in just a little bit farther. “Knew you’d take me like this. So _ tight _ .” His hand curls around her hip to brace her as he slides in farther. She makes a needy sound, and his mouth finds hers to capture it. “ _ Fuck, _ Rey—I’m almost—” He dips his hips until she can feel his thighs against hers, feel him so deep there is nowhere left to go. It’s _ wonderful. _ Ben licks along her lower lip. “_Rey_,” he grates, voice ragged. “There’s nowhere inside you I’m not.” He sounds reverent, sounds in _ awe_. “You’re fucking _ full _of me, Rey.”

She winds her arms around his neck, working her inner muscles to squeeze him, reveling in the fact that _ no—_there is absolutely nowhere he isn’t. “You’re so _ big, _ Ben.” She runs her hands over his massive shoulders for good measure. “Knew your cock would be perfect,” she sighs breathily, tongue dipping into his mouth for a languid stroke before ending in a heavy kiss. “I heard the way you touched yourself. Heard the way you fucked your own fist— _ so hard.” _ She nips at his lower lip, tilting her hips to seek even more of him. “That’s how I want you to fuck me.” Her nails scrape along his skin, and his cock twitches deep inside as she finds his ear to whisper, “_Hard.” _

He pulls out a little then, and the way he fits so tight—the way he drags along every inch inside her, Rey knows it won’t be long before she loses herself under Ben Solo. He pushes back in slowly, and the anxiousness rises in her because she _ needs _ this. She needs him to fuck her into the ground with nothing but a bit of nylon separating them from the wild woods and rolling river and endless night. “_Ben,” _ she whines, trying to hitch her hips up—trying to make him _ move_.

He holds her hips down, making sure she doesn’t move an inch. _ He _ is setting the pace right now. “Don’t worry, Rey,” he says as he takes a longer stroke, pushing into her just a little more forcefully this time. “I’m going to fuck you—_hard_. So hard you’ll feel me for _ days_.” Another deep thrust. “I just want to take a minute to really feel you on the inside. I’ve dreamed about this for months, and I want to _ savor _ it.” He punctuates this last thought with a thrust so hard, she cries out. 

His thrusts come harder and faster, and each one pushes her farther up the sleeping bag, “God, Rey, these tits—” He’s staring at her breasts, watching the way they bounce every time he enters her, and his eyes are _ ravenous _—bending down to pull a nipple into his mouth. 

The wet sounds of his cock moving through her, _ faster _ with each push—the sound his mouth makes as he laves and sucks her nipples—the scratching noise of her nails against the fabric of his sleeping bag as she scrambles for purchase—_all of it _ creates the perfect sound of _ them, _ and Rey never wants to forget it. Never wants to forget the stretch of him, the sounds of his soft pants against her chest, and the way he’s looking at her like she is something special and perfect.

He’s hitting someplace so _ deep _ in her, someplace only for him, and she’s so close. “Ben, _ ah, _ I’m gonna— _ ” _

He bears his weight on one arm and reaches down like he knows _ exactly _ what she needs without her having to say a word—like this is their hundredth time and not their first. His thumb finds her clit, but she’s so slick it slips, and she cries out, her arms wrapping around him, her nails digging into skin—“_Ben._”—but then he finds it again. He presses against it while pushing inside her as far as he can go—over and _ over, _and she can’t even pant or moan or _ think _ anymore. Every single fiber of her body is concentrated on that spot deep inside only he’s been able to reach, and his thumb rubbing slick circles. 

“Rey, _ please_, I can tell—_God, _ I want to feel it. I want you to come on my cock, _ fuck_, and as soon as you do, Rey, I’m going to fill—you— _ up _.”

His words and his hand and his cock undo her. “Oh, _Ben_.” Her nails dig deep, and her eyes squeeze shut, and her cunt convulses—_milking_ _him_—begging him to fill her impossibly more. 

And Ben… Ben wastes _ no _time.

His hands find her hips, pulling her to him, holding her onto his cock as he begins to _ drive _into her—fucking her just as hard as she asked him to. His thrusts prolong her orgasm, her cunt spasming in quivering aftershocks as Ben grunts above her, thighs slapping against her ass and hair clinging to his temples and eyes so dark they appear black in the dim haze of his tent. 

She can feel the way his cock twitches inside, feel it swell to impossible proportions, so thick it might _ break her— _ but she wants it. She wants _ every bit of it. _

“Fuck, _ fuck, _ you”—his hips stutter as his he rolls into her brutally—“feel so—I can _ feel _ it. I’m gonna—” His big body shakes when his hips still, slamming into her one last time before a warm gush fills her deep. She can feel every pulse, every little _ spurt _ of him as he empties into her, his hands so tight on her skin they’ll surely leave a mark tomorrow.

Rey finds she doesn’t mind in the slightest.

She tugs at anywhere she can reach to bring him down to her—gripping his arms and his shoulders until his body curls, and his lips find hers. She kisses him hungrily, feeling him still twitching inside, wishing she could somehow prolong this _ forever—_the feel of it better than anything she’s ever experienced.

She thinks maybe he means to pull away, maybe he thinks he’s too heavy, maybe he thinks she _ wants _him to—but she holds him close as he attempts to pull out. 

“Stay,” she murmurs against his lips. “Stay inside. For awhile.”

Ben’s arms curl around her as he falls to his side, pulling her into his chest as his lips move against her temple. “That was—”

“I know.”

“We could have been—”

“I _ know.” _ It isn’t lost on her just how much it _ this _she’s missed out on because of her own misplaced ire. “Trust me, I know.” She takes a deep breath, tracing her fingers down his bicep, turning her head against his chest to watch the glittering sky outside the tent. “It’s pretty out here.”

“Mhm.” He nuzzles his face in her hair. “You can’t see stars like this in the city.”

“You said you used to come out here when you were young?”

“With my Dad. Therapy, I guess you could call it. I was sort of an… angry teen.”

“Teenaged Ben Solo,” she laughs. “He must have been interesting.”

“His ears were too big, and he was sort of a dick.”

She reaches into his hair, tracing the shell of his ear. “At least you grew out of one of those things.”

Ben snorts, hand finding her ass to squeeze as she yelps a little. “Cute.”

“So, the fresh air is good for tempers, huh?” She chuckles under her breath. “Maybe that’s why I finally wisened up.”

“Maybe.” She can almost feel his grin against her hair. “He used to tell me when I got upset to start counting stars. Told me I’d feel better by the time I was done.”

“You’d never get done!”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure my dad just wanted to shut me up.”

She barks out a laugh. “And what about if it was daytime?”

“Shit outta luck, I guess.”

They both fall quiet, and it makes it easier for her guilt to take root. This pleasant conversation making it all too easy for her to remember every awful thing she’s ever said to him. “I’m so _ sorry, _Ben. For everything.”

He kisses her forehead. “It’s okay.”

“I was so awful to you.” She places her hands on his chest, pushing away to look up at him. “I mean, you made camp half a mile away just to get _ away _ from me.”

“What?” His brow furrows. “No, I didn’t.”

“But you—”

“I camped down here to get some fishing in,” he laughs softly. “Didn’t want to wake everyone up tomorrow lugging the gear down so early.”

She feels a flood of relief. Perhaps she wasn’t _ so _bad. “Then you didn’t do it because of me?”

“Rey.” He grins down at her, reaching to brush her hair from her face. “You might be a bit of a grouch, but I’ve never been _ scared _of you.”

His playful expression makes her laugh, and she pokes him in the ribs for good measure. “I didn’t even know you fished.”

“To be fair, there isn’t a whole lot you _ do _know about me.”

She goes a little quiet, that same guilt creeping back in before she feels his hand slide down her thigh, squeezing softly.

“Don’t,” he murmurs. “Don’t do that. It’s in the past.”

She nods into his chest, closing her eyes and enjoying the way he begins to stroke her hair. “What are we going to tell everyone tomorrow?”

“Maybe… we wait until we get back to tell them anything.” He grimaces. “Maybe we never tell Poe at all.”

She smiles against his skin. “I’m not entirely opposed to that. For now.”

“But if”—he clears his throat—“you wanted to… come back down here tomorrow night… Not that you _ have _to—but you could—”

“_Ben.” _She turns up her face, grinning up at him and pressing her lips to his. “I think maybe I could go for a little fishing, too. Have to be close to the river for that.”

His lips curl against hers, and his arms go tighter around her, and there’s a heavy twitch inside that makes her shudder. “Rey.” He shifts his hips deliberately, making a low sound in his chest. “Do you... have to go back just yet?”

Her eyes flutter closed, arms winding around his neck as his large hand presses into her spine. “No,” she answers breathlessly. “No, I don’t.”

* * *

“Thanks again for building the fire, Ben.” Poe is in his new favorite position: hunched over the campfire with a meat-on-a-stick in hand—this morning it’s sausage.

Everyone except Armitage is gathered around the warmth of the flames. Finn and Rose definitely look the worse for wear, clutching their paper cups of coffee like caffeinated lifelines. Kaydel, of course, is put together and perfect as if she didn’t just spend the night in the woods.

“Oh, uh, it’s really no problem.”

“Seriously Ben, I shudder to think what we’d resort to if we had to do it on our own,” Rey says, a small smile on her face. 

He looks different in the morning light. His face is softer and when he smiles at her, this time—_ finally_, the smile reaches his eyes. 

“Hey, Poe, seeing how Armie’s still asleep, I was wondering what time our first team building exercise was?” Rey asks nonchalantly. 

“Armie hit the wine pretty hard after you left last night. I’d say give him until noon, or he’ll be even more insufferable than his usual adorably insufferable self. Why do you ask?”

“Oh, um, Ben offered to take me fishing if we had some free time.”

Rey doesn’t miss how everyone’s eyes are immediately on her. Rose and Finn suddenly looking a little more alert than they were just seconds ago. 

“I guess that talk must have went well,” Kaydel chimes in, and Rey thinks there may be a knowing look in her eye. 

“Yeah, yeah, I guess you could say that.” Rey looks over to Ben who hasn’t taken his eyes off her since she climbed out of her tent this morning. She gives him a shy grin, not really caring in the slightest who makes what of it. “I think we really worked things out.”

The morning light and Ben’s windswept hair make it more than easy to spot the slight pink tinge at the tips of his ears—and Rey fantasizes for a moment about tracing her finger there. Her tongue, maybe. 

Poe’s low chuckle breaks through her reverie. “By all means. This is a team building trip, after all.”

Ben bites back a grin, a playful glint in his eyes that makes her chest feel a little tight, and she meets it happily, gaze lingering for a few sweet moments before he is distracted by something Finn says. She lets her eyes rove unabashedly over his quiet smile and his strong arms and his thick hair that she now knows is more than pleasing to run her fingers through, grinning softly to herself.

_ Team building. _

It’s laughable, really. 

This trip did so much more than that.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!  



End file.
